Archive for sex

His Secret Sex Zones

Cosmo guides you to five pleasure receptors on your man’s bod. After tonight, you’ll be seared into his memory.

Secret Sex Zone 1: Cremaster MuscleYou know how to work his body, but do you know how it works? The key to giving a guy maximum pleasure is using moves that make the most of his biology. “Having a better grasp of your partner’s physiology will intensify sex for both of you,” says Lana Holstein, M.D., author of Your Long Erotic Weekend. “When you understand why he reacts to certain touches and the best way to trigger those responses, you’ll be able to give him extreme gratification.” Intrigued? So were we, which is why we embarked on more randy research. Read on for our findings…then use your guy’s bod to do some lusty lab work of your own.

Secret Sex Zone 1: Cremaster Muscle

A man’s penis isn’t the only body part that experiences a rise and fall. “The cremaster, which lines the inside of the scrotum and extends into the groin, controls testicular contractions,” explains Barbara Bartlik, M.D., a psychiatrist and sex therapist at Weill Cornell Medical College in New York City. “It works kind of like a bungee cord, pulling the testicles upward in response to cold and releasing them when the temperature changes.”

How to master it: This magic muscle also responds to sexual stimulation, causing his boys to contract when he’s about to orgasm. “The closer a man is to climaxing, the more his testicles recede,” explains Debra Fromer, M.D., an assistant attending urologist at Hackensack University Medical Center, in New Jersey. In turn, pulling down on his balls when you’re in the midst of passion delays ejaculation, prolonging his pleasure.

So take advantage of Mother Nature — and give your guy the kind of big O that’ll make his head spin — by working against gravity and gently tugging on his pals as you’re giving him oral (when you have primo access). Start by teasing his inner thighs with your tongue. Then, “take his penis into your mouth, cup the scrotum with one hand and pull it away from his body,” says Lou Paget, author of The Great Lover Playbook. “Start off very gently, and ask your partner to let you know how hard he wants you to pull,” suggests Paget. “Get into a rhythmic pattern, working your hands in tandem with your mouth movements to virtually double the sensation.”

Secret Sex Zone 2: ProstateYou’re most likely aware that guys have something called a prostate, but you probably didn’t realize it’s also a pleasure minefield. This walnut-size gland surrounds the urethra and could be described as the male G-spot. “Its actual function is to create secretions that are part of the fluid in semen,” says Dr. Fromer. But when stimulated, this nugget of nerves can pack a powerful erotic punch.

How to master it: You can set off this internal bliss bomb through its neighbor, the corpus cavernosa, which are “two cavities of spongy, erectile tissue in the penis,” says Dr. Holstein. Think of them as a couple of cigar-shaped sponges that become engorged with blood (causing an erection) when a man is aroused.

Since the corpus cavernosa is next to the prostate, manually stimulating your man’s penis can subsequently stimulate his G-spot. “Wrap your hand around the shaft and move it toward your partner’s body rather than performing the usual up-and-down strokes,” says Carol Queen, Ph.D., sexologist at Good Vibrations. “Pushing toward him causes the two pieces of the corpus cavernosa to cuddle the prostate,” Queen continues. “It’s like giving him a sexy internal massage.”

Secret Sex Zone 3: Lips

Sure, smooching is hot, but you might not think of his kisser as one of the most thrill-inducing parts of his body. However, “the mucous membranes that comprise the lips have a dense supply of nerve endings,” says Dr. Bartlik. “Plus, the skin here is very thin, so that network of nerves is closer to the surface, making it more responsive to stimulation.”

How to master it: Before you plant a big wet one on him, tease him by kissing him everywhere but his lips. Give him kisses all over his face and neck to build anticipation. When he’s so fired up that he’s compelled to move in for a full-blown lip-lock, amp up the titillation factor by mixing your moves. Lick his lips as if you were lapping an ice cream cone, suck on the tip of his tongue and graze your lips against his. “As he becomes increasingly aroused, his lips will engorge with blood, making them more sensitive,” says Dr. Bartlik.

You’ll really send a jolt of erotic electricity through his system if you vary the texture by alternately using the top and underside of your tongue. “The different sensations add newness and surprise, which heighten the excitement,” says Paget. Another pucker ploy: “Take his lower lip into your mouth, and with the tip of your tongue, lick the little nook where his lip and chin meet,” suggests Paget. “This region is surprisingly sensitive and often overlooked, which makes it that much more pleasurable.”

Secret Sex Zone 4: Nipples

In the past, Cosmo’s clued you in to the frisky fact that men’s headlights are crammed with pleasure-receptive nerve endings, but some of you still might not be giving them the attention they deserve. Remember, it’s how you work them that really matters. “When stimulated correctly, these erogenous zones transmit feel-good sensations to the brain in the same way the genitals do,” says Dr. Bartlik.

How to master it: To make his nipples — and the rest of him — quiver, play with them while you’re having girl-on-top nooky. Start off coyly and allow the anticipation to grow by trailing your index finger along his chest, making gentle circles around, but not quite touching, his nips. Then run your hand down his rib cage on one side, across his lower abs where his pubic hair begins and up the other side. Return to his now supererect headlights and make circles again. Only this time let your finger zero in on the bull’s-eye. “Lightly dance around his nipples and the areolae with your fingertip to draw out the excitement,” says Queen.

Treat him to even more pulse-pounding sensations by getting your mouth in on the action. “Substitute the tip of your tongue for your finger,” says Paget. “Start licking the outline of the nipples and gradually work your way in, making smaller and smaller circles.” You can up the erotic ante by periodically sucking, and even nibbling, on his erect nipples. “Hold it between your lips and suck, bite lightly, then gently swirl your tongue around it and give it a kiss,” says Queen. “Periodically, pull away and just graze the area with your hair or your lips, letting your hot breath linger on one nipple, then the other.” After turning him on to this trick, he’ll really be a boob man.

Secret Sex Zone 5: Perineum

By now you’ve heard of the perineum, the patch of skin that lies between his family jewels and anus and is endowed with orgasmic potential. “The perineum is rich with nerve endings that, when stimulated in the right way, can produce satisfying sensations,” says Paget.

How to master it: What you may not realize is, the best way to access this neural nub is in missionary position, where you can easily reach between his legs. When he seems to be nearing the finish line, gently press into this spot with the knuckle of your index finger. “This is such a highly sensitive area, it’s best to use your knuckle so you don’t accidentally scratch him,” explains Paget.

To knead him into orgasmic oblivion, mix up the direction and amount of pressure. “When you touch one area repetitively, the nerve endings become exhausted and no longer sense pleasure,” says Dr. Holstein. So first go in clockwise circles, then switch to counterclockwise, then massage up and down, and so forth. Keeping him on edge by switching moves will have his entire neural network on high. When he’s ready to blow, press this bundle of feel-good receptors a little harder to give him the ultimate O.

Position Secrets for a Faster Orgasm Every Time

When are you most likely to orgasm quickly? During solo sex. Why? Because you’re in control. But who says you can’t take charge of your orgasm during intercourse? In this excerpt from her book 5 Minutes to Orgasm Every Time You Make Love, author D. Claire Hutchins gives the play-by-play on exactly how to achieve orgasm at your pace — however you want it:

After you and your partner have participated in foreplay, however much you want, and when you feel ready for sex, have your man lie on his back, his penis aroused and standing ready for you to straddle him. Don’t be in too much of a hurry to get him inside of you. Take advantage of the opportunity to display your body; he will love watching you work. With him on his back and you on your knees, swing one leg over him and balance your weight on your knees. Then lean forward to take some of your weight on your hands. Take his penis in hand and rub your moist vaginal lips and clitoris against it. Tease the head of his penis by sliding it back and forth across your vaginal opening, occasionally inserting just the tip and taking it out again. Finally, slide it in gently and slowly. You may need to use a free hand, or he can use his, to guide his penis into your vagina. Straddling his thighs, you lower yourself onto his penis. Once he is inside of you, sink down on him, remaining upright from the waist up.

In this position, you control the depth of penile penetration and the pace of thrusting. You manipulate the amount of friction and the speed. You have an infinite variety of movements. You can raise your body up and down, bend forward with your breasts touching his chest or slide your breasts back and forth. You can move your pelvis and abdomen sideways and in all directions to give different kinds of erotic pleasure. Lean forward to create friction between his pubic bone and your clitoris. Men may want to arch their backs and raise their pelvises to help create a connection between the clitoris and penis.

Be a Champion at Lovemaking

Try all variations and see what stimulates you most. You will be very deeply penetrated, and the man’s most sensitive area is buried deeply within your moist and warm vagina. Your partner can rest while enjoying exquisite sensations. When you have your orgasm, he can feel the rippling of your vaginal muscles much more intensely than in any other position.

Above all, this position is comfortable for most women, gives us greater freedom of movement and puts us in control of our own orgasm. Some of us may be mentally uncomfortable with what our physiological inhibitions may be telling us is aggressive exhibitionism. Tell your mind to shut up. Be sure to close your eyes, at least part of the time. Don’t examine your body, don’t worry about how you look and don’t try to analyze what he is thinking throughout the whole thing.

By parting the vaginal lips and leaning forward to your partner’s chest, you can bring your clitoris directly into contact with the base of the man’s penis, and rubbing the exposed shaft of his penis against your clitoris may be all the direct stimulation of the clitoris you need to reach orgasm.

Another option is to have your lover place his thumb on your clitoris and hold it firmly in place while you move up and down, but the position of his hand may feel somewhat awkward for you both. It seems that when men stimulate their partners, they don’t do it very well. Maybe he feels awkward, embarrassed or resentful. I believe most simply do not share the same sense of rhythm as their women. And it is also objectionable because you’ve turned your response back over to him.

For some women, changing from the missionary to the female-superior may be all that is necessary to achieve orgasm easier than you ever thought possible. Learning how to “ride” your man will make you a champion at lovemaking.

What men want

So we’ve all seen the movie “What Women Want” with Mel Gibson.

What about what MEN want? I was readin a lil today and ran across this found that it may be of some interest to some of you.

~~Feel free to add suggestions of your own~~

  • Men would like their partner to be more confident and/or open. She should be willing to stand naked in front of him. She should be willing to tell him what she does and doesn’t like. She should be willing to at least try something new. You get the idea. Ladies, you need to stop being self-conscious and realize that you will turn him on even if your body isn’t perfect.
  • MORE MORE MORE! Men want more sex. Wow, I heard you on this one. A lot of men want more sex than what they are now getting. This applies to both single men and men in relationships.
  • Oral sex A lot of men complained about this one in varying degrees. Either they never get it, they get it but she stops too soon, or they get it but only every once in a long while.

Here are a few tips to help out with this one:

Tips for Men

  • Practice good hygiene. Take a shower before becoming intimate.
  • Be sure you are giving as good as you expect to receive.
  • Warm her up first, don’t just throw it in her face and expect her to go to it.

Tips for Women

  • If you don’t enjoy performing fellatio, find ways to make it more pleasurable. For example, flavored oils, chocolate sauce, or whipped cream.
  • Get an anal toy. Men can have anal orgasms and it will take a lot less work on your part. If he’s never had an anal orgasm, you have covered ‘be willing to try new things’ too.
  • If he insists that you swallow but you hate the taste, ask him to change his diet. Meat makes semen taste bitter so men who are vegetarians taste much sweeter.
  • Initiate sex. Men want the woman to initiate sex at least some of the time. They enjoy the feeling of being desired as much as women do. Ladies, if you wait for him to start it every time, then he will never know when you are doing it because you want to, or just doing it to make him happy.
  • Masturbate for him. Men love to watch. Ladies, if you feel self-conscious, here are some ways to get things going:
  • Have a drink or two to lower your inhibitions.
  • Have him start you off, then you take over.
  • Use a vibrator as this will take less work on your part and will be more enjoyable for you.
  • My motto is practice first, after all, practice makes perfect. If you are very familiar with your own body, masturbating for him will be much easier to do.

    That pretty much covers the most mentioned topics. Of course there are other things but these vary some from man to man. Men, if there is something you really, really, want her to do but she won’t, first consider why she doesn’t want to. Does she have a good reason such as it will be painful? Or is it something that she just has no interest in? If this is the case, be patient. Introduce it slowly and listen to what she says. Sometimes it’s not the act itself she objects to but the way you go about it. Making her feel inadequate or defensive for not doing it, pretty much guarantees that she never will.

    Ladies, the number one reason why a man cheats is that he can’t get what he needs at home. (Men this isn’t an excuse to blackmail your woman! This only applies to things that are really needed for you to be happy.) Listen to his requests. If they are reasonable, try to be open minded and you just may discover that it isn’t as awful as you thought it would be or, possibly, that it’s something you really end up liking.